Closet Atheist

Yes, I am a closet atheist.  Wait, you've heard that I don't believe in "God"?  Well, then I guess I'm not technically a "closet atheist" then.  Sometimes I wonder if I am a "real atheist" because I definitely believe in ghosts.  Many people feel that atheists do not believe in supernatural beings; therefore, I am not technically not an atheist.  I beg to differ, as many atheists may agree.  There is no such thing as an "atheist doctrine of non-beliefs" so I can call myself whatever I want.  Maybe a pretentious jerk out there might disagree with me.  Whatever.  Just goes to show that I don't like people trying to define me for my beliefs.

I choose to call myself an atheist simply because I like the way it makes me feel.  It makes me feel good to think of myself as an atheist because I know I am not alone. I am not going to shout it to the rooftops or proclaim my beliefs on Facebook with lots of excitement.  On the other hand, I do want to have the freedom around others to express my beliefs, just as my fellow Christians, Jews, Buddhists, etc.  I want to be able to have a conversation with someone about my beliefs without feeling ashamed or without feeling judged by others.  I usually just keep my thoughts to myself about "God." (FYI I choose to capitalize "God" out of respect for my loved ones, to which believe in him with all of their minds and bodies).

The other day, my family and I were talking about someone in the family who is an atheist.  I said to my mom, "Did you know that XXX was an atheist?"  My mom said, "So?"  It was the first time I ever felt supported by my mother. As I continue to make steps toward being myself and being more true to my beliefs, stuff like this will lighten my load.  Thanks, mom.

Lastly, I would like to say thank you to all of my family and friends who pray for me.  Just as I send thoughts of love and kindness, they offer me a similar sentiment by praying for me.  Thank you for your thoughts.    Please continue to love one another.  I know I will.



"If atheism is a religion, bald is a hair color" ("What is Atheism?").*

Citations:
"What is Atheism"
http://www.atheists.org/activism/resources/what-is-atheism